The Beginning

Well, folks, it’s been an interesting twist of events the last couple of months.

I guess it all started about a year ago right around now.

Almost a year ago, I followed a call God had given for my life. I went on a trip to Central America and lived for the summer, doing mission work, learning, living with God's people and being the hands and feet of Christ (especially for those that couldn't actually transport themselves down there). 

When I got back to the United States in the fall I missed my home, my home in Central America. Where part of my heart will always lie. I never wanted to leave the beautiful country and stop doing such in depth work with God and His so friendly people. So I made a deal with God -well more like, I knew what He wanted for me and I just needed to wait and have patience- to wait for a while before I went on another mission and work on my degree. Even though I so strongly desired to go on missions and be home.  

About 4 months ago I went to Mexico and followed the cry of my heart and my purpose in life. I again never wanted to leave because I could feel Christ so strongly calling me to that part of the country and to His people there. But I knew I would be back again, actually a little less than 5 months from that date in December. So I was at a peace because I knew I would be home again.

This is how I feel when I am living the cry of my heart and where I am suppose to be: 

"Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them."

Hebrews 11:16 

I felt the most at home. 

My heart is broke, because of the swine flu. Not just because I wasn’t able to be there, but because I knew I couldn’t be there. My friends and my family, my heavenly country was in trouble and I couldn’t help. I had to just pray. It's not that I hadn’t given it all to God and put it in His hands. I have.  (Or so I thought).

I had never felt such a strong call upon my heart from the Lord. At the time that my emotions were at peak (ultimate frustration, disappointment and sadness), during particular time, I hadn’t slept in 2 days because I couldn’t seem to let this fall and die and let it rest. I had too much on my heart and too much to think about and pray about to sleep. I felt so close to God and was so happy about that. I just wished I could be there. My heart really hurt.

Since that time, God has given me peace. I have realized that I need to create that Heavenly place where my heart resides here (in Portland) and allow myself to grow and mature in Him and be able to be this person that needs to grow and become the person I've grown so far from. I decided that I needed to work on myself and this person and just areas in my life. I decided that that’s what my summer was going to be dedicated to. And it took me an entire year to get to this point of realization and growth.

 

On Tuesday, June 2^nd Joel Tooley (one of the heads of Youth in Mission- the organization I traveled with last summer to Central America) and Scott Armstrong (a missionary that lead my group in Central America) called me. Telling me that one of the two girls on the American team going to Veracruz, Mexico for the summer had a emotional break down (it’s ended up being a really good thing for her and she has totally peace about it and feels that its in God’s plan for her to be home and I’m proud of her) when she got to Mexico and went home two days later. So they offered me her spot. I told them I didn't have the money and they said I could have her money she fundraised and pay for my ticket. While I was in Mexico I could just try and see what money I could raise and through that pay them back for the plane ticket.

I told them I'd think and pray about it and let them know the following morning, and talk to my parents about it.

Then a camp that I applied to the previous week called me, about an hour. The camp director asked me asked me if I was still interested in working at camp and I was at a loss for words. So I told him the situation and he told me to go. He asked me if I had to choose between Trout Creek and Mexico in the next 5 seconds what I would choose and I automatically said Mexico...I didn't really even think about it. So I told him I was praying about it and he essentially told me I should go but said that if I didn't there would be most likely be a place for me at camp.

After so much prayer, thought, reading the Word, talking with my parents, praying with my parents, and talking to friends. I made a decision that night: not to go to Mexico, to stay home and really plant roots where I am meant to be. I told my friend Steve this whole story and he asked me who needed me the most. I really struggled with that and decided that my attitude going into serving from last summer in Central America to what I was about to do now was entirely different. My pastor, Jim Wicks, talked with me a few months back about having a servants heart and going into places and serving. Not trying to get an experience or “camp high” out of the serving but really giving your heart to those people and giving to them. I knew that if I chose to go, I wouldn’t have a “camp high” in Mexico. I knew that my heart was where God wanted it to be. After praying so much that He would prepare my heart for the service ahead and get it ready, He really did. And with that, I decided, they really needed me in Mexico. So as much as I desire to plant seeds and roots in Portland, it can wait. And I’m going to Mexico this summer to serve the community and love like Christ did. So I hope you will read my adventures and the way that God is stretching me and still preparing my heart for what is to come but most of allowing me to simply be a tool and Him to really be at work.  I hope that you may also partner in prayer with me for this summer and the things to come, that I can really be the woman of Christ He desires and my heart will be in the right place all the while.

I know so long, almost done!

I leave on Friday morning at 12:30 am and arrive in Mexico City at 10:15 am. I am being picked up by some missionaries there and later in the evening driving to Xalapa, which is where we will be stationed/be able to call home for the summer well parts of it.

I will let you all know what I’m up to as often as I can through this blog! And pass the link on to your friends and family!

Blessings to you all!